Wow, I seriously cannot believe how drastic of a turn this weekend took in comparison to last year. I feel like memorial day weekend was always OUR weekend with him to laugh and celebrate another birthday with him in his old navy tshirt that he always wore. This weekend is going to be unbearable because it just screams daddy every moment. His absence makes it impossible to enjoy this weekend one bit, no falling in the pool with the chair still under him, no birthday cake, no mimicking everything Grandma Marie has to say. Even though I laugh hysterically out loud whenever I think of these memories as soon as I cease laughing I can feel the most immense pain in my heart when I release that this is where it stops, right at the memories and nothing left to come with him in the near future. I think of all the slow and impatient trips to pathmark with him as it would take him an hour just to get through 2 aisles (sorry daddy but you know thats true) and i regret complaining once about how long he took because I would give anything to wander around that supermarket with him aimlessly one more time. Happy birthday daddy, I love and miss you so much and you are loved by so many who have you on their mind today. Hope you're dancing up there with Grandpa.